Wurstkuche Rattlesnake vs. Bistro LQ Hare

Extreme Eating: uncle!
My uncle Rudy is the best storyteller that ever lived. No one can tell it like this man. I remember sitting at his feet as he spinned yarns about his fishing and hunting exploits. Boy was he good! But here’s the thing: He really was an awesome fisher and hunter. I saw him take down ungodly huge beasts with my very own eyes. I could listen to him all day talk about his years in World War 2 and the Korean Conflict. Here’s the thing: He really did serve in World War 2 and the Korean Conflict. The rumor around the family is that he would have served in Vietnam if the powers-that-be let him (the U.S. government felt he served his country enough. Time to retire. Stop serving your country already!) One of the best tales he ever told was how he hunted rattle snakes and skinned them alive. Here’s the thing: I actually saw him kill a rattlesnake and skin it clean. The thing about uncle Rudy is that he, like, did all those things he talked about. What an amazing man! I remember that rattler, ugh, getting stripped of its skin and thrown in a pan. I couldn’t do it. Sorry, uncle, I cannot eat that. Love you, but no thank you. But what stories he told! I just wished he made them up. I wish I don’t have that snake and its evil eye permanently etched in my brain. I resolved that day I could never eat a rattler. Enter LA’s Wurstkuche. They serve a rattlesnake sausage sandwich. You can wash it down with as many IPAs as you want but dude, you are eating rattler. This is serious business. This is extreme eating. And I did it: I ate it.
Bistro LQ could top this extreme eating game with their sliders of stewed hare. I grew up in San Dimas where seeing smashed hares on the 10 freeway was commonplace. It used to make my stomach turn when, as a thirteen year-old, my stepfather would take that part of the freeway and we were coming up to the “smashed hares” part of the freeway. The first time I smashed a hare with my own car I wanted to cry. Oh, I am so sorry, little Bugs Bunny, I didn’t mean to! But you guys are everywhere! Can’t you just go in your little holes and eat carrots the way you do in the cartoons? And now, in an almost ridiculous display of extreme eating, Bistro LQ serves these hares in a little hamburger bun. So who wins this extreme eating contest, Wurstkuche or Bistro LQ? Easy, Bistro LQ, but not because of their hare, (which was absolutely delicious I am ashamed to say). They get the title for their oyster specked tapioca shooter. Oh, man, this dish is too much for me. Salt, oyster, and tapioca pudding should never swim in the same glass. I really, really tried to eat the whole thing. Bistro LQ, uncle, uncle!